This week at Lectio, we read the story of 'The Blinding of Saul' (The Message) and I saw that no matter which direction we are coming from, as long as we obey we can end up at the same table.
The story went like this -
Saul was out for the kill.
He was suddenly dazed by a blinding light.
Found out it was Jesus.
Jesus said, 'get up, enter the city and you'll be told what to do'
Saul was blind, but went.
Ananias was spoken to by Jesus.
'Yes, Master?'
Get up and go.
Lots of protest.
Jesus says, 'Don't argue, Go!'
Ananias goes, put his hands on Saul.
Saul could see again, was baptized and both men sat down together and ate a hearty meal.
I think I am both like Saul and Ananias mixed together. I can see me standing in the middle of a see saw and trying my hardest to balance it evenly, but I know I'm failing. One side keeps going up and the other down - back and forth, over and over.
On Saul's end, God is saying, 'ok, I've blinded you, now get up and go and I'll tell you what to do when you get there.'
On the Ananias' end, I say I am a Christian, I feel I listen to God and I say 'yes' to Him. But then comes the, 'I can't or I'm afraid' words when I'm asked to do something.
I don't know where I'm going and I think, 'how long do I need to be blind before I can see or maybe I argue with God when he asks me to do something and why am I so afraid?' I don't know any of the answers and pray one day I won't be blind anymore.
Nancy
